I remember the day when those words, directed at me, hung in the air. They had been said randomly. If anyone else had uttered them, I think I would have been angry. But the speaker knew me. Not as well as I think they should, but somehow, well enough.
“You don’t like yourself.”
After hearing that sentence, another person might have been mad. But I was curious.
How could this person be so sure? What were they seeing?
Sometime last year when I was thinking about authentic self care, I realized something. There are a ton of things that I can do in order to feel whole. But do I invest in them? How do I feel about honouring my most sacred gift: myself?
While wondering this, something else hit me. I’ve been meaning to delve into this topic for ages, but have only scratched the surface.
Why have I avoided talking about self-care?
Am I afraid to be still in my own skin? It’s hard for me not to think so. It’s even harder for me to admit that. But the first step in solving a problem is recognizing that you have one. So here I am.
I’ve been running away from myself for a long time. That needs to change. And slowly but surely, it will.