PodPost, status report

Mic Fright?

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Dear Reader,

I thought I’d give you a bit of an update on one of my projects—the claire.she.goes podcast. I’ve been working at it sporadically over the past few years, and I’ve been thinking about taking things to the next level.

If you were at last month’s Paris Lectures event, you already know some of this story. If not, bear with me.

I’ve been thinking a great deal about my podcast. A little while ago I decided that I wanted to engage in dynamic storytelling. One way of doing that is to include interviews on my show. I felt inspired to start a series, but hit a huge roadblock.

Something happened shortly after I began booking appointments. I recorded my first interview, but things didn’t work out.

Firstly, I had a technical issue. My setup was somehow off, and only my side of the conversation got recorded. Secondly, something significant went on that I couldn’t ignore. It was a Friday when I tried to record that ruined interview. Would you believe that as soon as I pressed record, I started to develop a pain in my chest?

It didn’t leave me until over 24 hours later.

After that, I cancelled the other interview that I had planned. I decided instead to focus on email-based conversations.

And yet…In spite of my body’s behaviour, I knew what I wanted and STILL want to achieve.

I put my game face on and went to Paris Lectures. It was a special evening. Normally presenters are invited to chat in front of the audience and share information about their pet projects. However, in the weeks before I showed up, folks were allowed to submit to present in front of their peers. I was one of them.

I spoke about my podcast—my dreams, but also my discomfort.

That night, I felt inspired to start interviewing some of my town’s locals. We have a lot of very talented, interesting people around. I figured, ”Why not?!?”

I began to reach out and emailed a few folks.

At first, I felt fine.

THEN, as I started to think more seriously about making arrangements, something uncomfortably familiar happened. I began to feel sick to my stomach.

I realize thanks to editing you might not be able to tell, but when I record my shows, I’m very, VERY nervous. In spite of this, a part of me is determined. I believe I have something to offer the world of podcasting. Hence, my physical reaction doesn’t make any sense. Not even to me.

So what am I doing about it?

Moving forward.

Last week I recorded an interview and I survived. I think it helped that I told myself over and over again, ”It’s just a conversation, Claire.”

Because really, that’s all a good interview is. A conversation.

As I edited my latest episode, I felt myself becoming critical.

You could’ve been more confident, Claire. Why’d you have to laugh so hard?!?

On and on I could have gone, but in the end it means nothing. Especially in light of where I now stand: At the threshold of possibility.

Really. In spite of any lingering sense of fear, I feel like I could talk to anyone!

I’m a great writer. I can become a great interviewer.

What else have I learned…?

Don’t be afraid to look your dreams in the eye. Give them the attention they deserve.

Also, in your journey as a creator, give yourself room to grow. I firmly believe that can only come by owning your awkwardness and accepting your limits…

So you can CRUSH them.

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